Tag Archives: Stolen Quotes

I heard that you were feeling ill. Headache, fever, and a chill. I came to help restore your pluck, cause I’m the nurse who likes to…

Now that’s an amusing clip from Mr John Hughes’ fictionalized version of events, but, although it’s not widely known, I was indirectly responsible for concerned friends of a certain young Ferris Bueller hiring that hooker in an attempt to restore his pluck.

Continue reading

Cheeses from around the world

I did not achieve this position in life by having some snot-nosed punk leave my cheese out in the wind

Let me tell you a story. Back in the early 80’s I had just had a meal with my lovely wife at our favorite restaurant, Chez Quis. We were waiting outside for the valet to bring our car. The driver was new, sporting a ridiculous spiky hairstyle, constantly sneezing and wiping his nose on his sleeve, and really was quite the imbecile to boot. Anyhow, he kept bringing us the wrong damn automobile.

Continue reading